Monday, November 16, 2009

My nine year old is asking me if the Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy, etc. exist, do I tell her the truth?

A few of the children in my daughter's class are telling her there is no such thing as the Easter Bunny, Santa, etc. She has asked me if I am the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy and Santa. I have managed to put off answering her and while I don't want to lie to her, I am also not sure she is ready to know the truth. My older daughter was the same age when I told her the truth and she told me she wished I hadn't told her the truth. With Easter less than a week away, I'm torn! Is there any way to let your child know in a way that won't hurt?

My nine year old is asking me if the Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy, etc. exist, do I tell her the truth?
If you feel she is not ready to hear the truth - my answer is don't. Let her be a child for as long as is possible - my ten, nearly 11 year old daughter, has doubts, but still believes - childhood is too short these days as it is.... My son was about 7 (now 16) - and I cried because of the loss of inocence and wonder in magic. My 7 year old daughter - relishes in the magic and yes my 16 year old still helps the magic to stay alive along as possible for my girls. Your daughter will decide when she is ready and not before. Why destroy the things that truly keep childhood magical. As you are aware to tell can have long lasting repercussions emotionally. She will let you know in no uncertain terms when she is ready not to believe. Some of the questions, she has are probably more for reasurrance in their existance, that they are truly real!!
Reply:No i would not tell her that they are not true... i would just let her find out herself when she is older!!
Reply:If she's asking, she most likely already knows. I would tell her the truth if she asks.
Reply:She's nine years old she's not five anymore. Yes I think you should tell her the truth.
Reply:Ask her if she thinks they're real. More than likely she's already figured it out. I did when i was nine. Oh and keep in mind your daughters are different people and will take to things differently
Reply:If she's asking... she already knows. You upholding the lie now will be worse in the long run for her than telling the truth now. Explain it to her as a magic of being a young child and how she shouldn't ruin that for other children.





I remember being crushed as a child, not because those things aren't real but because my mom and dad had lied to me. As a parent you try to teach your child to be truthful and you tell them that you wouldn't lie to them.... so don't lie now.
Reply:at 9 years old? that's too old to be holding onto a lie.


Why do parents insist on doing this anyway. Our kids have never believed in that fake stuff, and they're just as happy as the next kid.
Reply:let her believe in them for awhile longer.. its nice as a kid to beleive in stuff like that. it makes life seem more magical. my parents never reallly told me that they werent real, i just learned as i got older, i think that is a good way to learn. dont lie to ur kids, u could make a joke about it or dont really answer her or something if she asks. like if she asks 'is santa real' you could say, 'if u dont beleive in him he wont come' or something..
Reply:I told mine that santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy, ect.. is only real to kids that believe in them. I wasn't lying to them.
Reply:I am 29 and I still believe in Santa, Easter bunny, etc. Tell your daughter if she wants to believe in them she can, but also tell her the truth about how YOU and others don't believe they exist.
Reply:you don't tell the truth. She is still young and as your older daughter said, she wishes she didn't know. It takes away the magic and wonder. If this is the first time she has asked I would not be telling. Just explain that if you believe they come, If you don't believe they don't
Reply:Personally, I think that nine is a little old to still believe in these things. But I recommend not lying to your child. If she is asking, she's gotten the idea but may be afraid to lose the Easter baskets and Santa Claus presents. When my children started asking, I would ask in return, "What do you think?" Wiehn you do have that talk, assure her that her favorite traditions will continue for as long as she wants them to. We still do Easter baskets and Santa presents even though my kids are way past that age.
Reply:I have a 10 year old son who has been asking for the past couple of years. My answer has always been... "What do you think?" He's always said, "I WANT to believe..." and I've told him... "then believe... I do!" and I do, I believe in the spirit of Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc.





Just the other day he saw a Walmart commercial that basically spills the beans about the Easter Bunny and he asked me point blank, "Mom, do you fill my easter basket"... to me that was a totally different question. I told him that I do. He asked if I put the Christmas presents under the tree... and I asked him, "do you really want to know?" he said, "No."





Ask more questions... does she REALLY want to know? If she does... then tell her. If not, let her hang onto it for awhile. You never get that time back....
Reply:just say that they arent
Reply:This is a very touchy situation for a child and for you as a parent. Telling them that there is no such person can be devistating. I told my children that there is no such single person but everyone has it in them. My youngest is realizing this and has his moments when he is angry that the tooth fairy,etc. didn't bring him what he wants. That's when I remind him of how many children are in the world and how busy they must be.


Then I tell him I love him more and get him something special not what he wanted but something else.
Reply:Let her believe, don't rob her of her childhood. Ask her if she believes deep down in her heart. let it be her choice.You and I are adults, but we make believe because our children do think they are real.
Reply:Well first of all...you said that you didn't want to lie to your children. What do you think telling them the easter bunny, santa, etc.. is? I personally think that you shouldn't tell children that those kind of fairy tales are real anyways. I would've told them the truth the minute they asked. I would not lie to my children because after they find out that it's not true, they'll be dissappointed that you lied to them. Just tell your child that indeed, you are the easter bunny, santa, and etc.

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